We've all heard the saying, "Actions speak louder than words". Lately I find myself really reflecting on that very quote...and wondering if it is true. I've always thought it to be true. I've even made decisions in my life based on my belief in that quote. Have you?
When you love someone...in any type of relationship; marriage, friendship, family...don't you want the best for that person? Do you put that person before yourself when it comes to decision making? Perhaps not always...after all...we are only human. However...I think we should try to put that person's wants/needs before ourselves, that's what I try to do anyhow.
It's so hard when someone you really care about lets you down...again...and again. Finally, you begin to wonder...does this person really love me? They say they love me...but...their actions are really saying something else. You begin to evaluate the relationship itself...at least I do. I want to be surrounded by those I truly love and care about and vice versa.
Time always tells...that's what I say alot...and another friend of mine says quite often. Thoughts, friends?
Love,
Kasey
2 comments:
Wow! I have been pondering this same exact thought. I think words are very powerful, but I also think they are meaningless when there is no action behind them. I am with you in regards to friendships. When I feel like I am more of an obligation in a friendship than a desire or a joy, it may be time to move on. As it stands, I have been praying a lot about my situation, and I'm not sure where the Lord is leading, so I wait. As I get older, I want to surround myself with loving, trustworthy, non-judgemental and encouraging women. Thank you for your post. It is very helpful to know that I am not alone in this.
In general, the saying is true and I pay attention to those messages or lack thereof. BUT, I think it may depend on the relationship and dynamics and how long the lack of action continues. I also think there is a difference between friendships and the relationship with a partner. There seems to be a blanket problem with taking people for granted these days, and that is the worst thing for any relationship.
I often hear women say,"I'm just so busy with my own stuff, it's hard to keep up with friends." That's fine, but those same "friends" shouldn't EXPECT us to jump to their beckon call when they pop up once in a blue moon.
I think men tend to think it's enough that we "know" they love us, especially after being together for years. Showing and receiving love is different for everyone and that's where the breakdown tends to happen. I really think the book "The Five Languages of Love" can help many relationships. There seems to be a lot of misunderstanding and assumptions about "showing love"... our partners need to learn and care about what makes us feel loved, which may be different than what makes them feel loved. We need to listen and return the actions according to what makes the other person feel loved. If we have clearly communicated and know that they understand what we need, crave, and they still don't show it, that is a problem. We also need to remind others at times, in a positive way, being careful not to complain. Positive reinforcement works for all mammals! Having said ALL of that, there are some friendships that just end up one-sided and it may make us happier to just let some of them go. I think this comment is much longer than your post, whoopsie! In the words of Led Zeppelin, Ramble On! =)
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